no words

we've had some well-meaning friends trying to offer us some words of consolation over bodge's death, and i love them for the intention.
but don't tell me that we can be happy that he's in a better place now. don't tell me that he wouldn't want us to be sad for too long. don't tell me that there's some higher purpose in his passing. just don't.

today i went down to see towe. and on the way i thought long and hard about what i wanted to say to her.
there were some heartfelt, honest, truthful things that i worked out, but when i got there, and in the shadow of that huge loss, those things that i tried to say were pitiful and small and insignificant. still true and utterly from the heart, but useless and dwarfed by the absolute desolation he's left behind.
when it comes down to it, like job's friends in the old testament story, there's only silence and weeping for times like this. no words.